Journal July 2021

Date: 1/7

Today is the first day, I have started doing meditation properly, sincerely, easily, seriously, and disciplinely. Even last month, when I joined the meditation sessions with Pradeep and Navneet Master, I was still drowning in the darkness. 

But yesterday night, after talking to Navneet Master just for a few minutes before the session starts, suddenly I felt like a shell was broken, and I step out of it. And it was a total silence, no more mind chattering, it was a pin drop silence. It made me realise that I am that silence, the nothingness! 

Date:6/7

Today, I was reborn! 

I am no longer yesterday's Chandra Sharmila, who was born on 31st January 1979.

Everything has changed inside of me, I have become a new person. I am a new person!  I am full of happiness inside. I am joyful for no reason. 

I am thankful for everyone who have come along in this life journey to train me, so that I would attain this maturity and understanding of the basic life concept. 

In the morning, when I was reading mantiram I was connected with OmSakthi Amma. It was a wonderful feeling. Tears were flowing out of gratitude towards Amma for Her patience in guiding this baby soul, who was not aware of anything about herself.

In the afternoon, I was listening to with Patrijii's session, and for the first time I was connected to Patriji. I have gotten the real clarity and the wholesome basic understanding of meditation, purpose of life and how to live it. 

Suddenly, I saw myself in everyone else around me, plants, panjabutanggal, nature and all. Suddenly, I am able to accept everyone around me, no matter how they have behaved to me , actually they are just like me before I have this basic realisation, but deep inside it is me there, so it doesn't matter anymore.

Thank you so much Amma, Patriji, all the Masters, my darling sisters, everyone and everything. I love you all...